I am in Bristol, staying with my friend Claire Delacroix. As we relax on the sofa, we call our slave to bring us dessert. He arrives with a tray holding two brownies. When we taste them, we immediately realise that they are truly inedible. We cannot even chew them and, disgusted, we spit them out on the floor. Ferociously, we grab his head and order him to eat the food we spat out directly from the floor. We enjoy crushing him and making him eat it directly from our feet. We are not satisfied with how he is behaving, so we make him lie down in front of us and start crushing the brownies on his chest. With our fingers and the soles of our feet, we feed him, and the mush on his stomach gradually ends up in his mouth. Our spit ends up on his tongue to help him swallow the food more easily. We make him lick the food directly from each of our toes. When his mouth is full, we cover it, first with our hands and then
